This story was relayed to me from one 
            of my customers just the other day.

Mike's Story

    We got on the subject of dogs, big ones, little ones, and the ones we 
had as a child. My customer, Mike, was standing there ... in my lobby... 
with this half grin, half shock look on his face.... He said, "Gonzo, let 
me tell you a story" This is how it went.

    My brother’s wife has this habit of thinking she is going to save the 
world and every living creature from harm no matter what it takes to 
accomplish this task. She was driving by an old cemetery when she 
noticed a large dog with no collar, full of burrs and looked like it 
hadn't eaten in a week. "Must be a stray honey, I'm stopping the car," she said. Now my brother who was sitting in the passenger seat has learned over the years not to say much about his wife's activities.   Because, eventually things always end up back as his problem. This didn't seem like such a bad thing ... it's just a dog you know. 

    His wife got out of the car and opened the rear door. She yelled over to the dog, "Come here boy" and the dog took off for the car, jumped in the back seat ... puts it's paws on the back of the front seat and licks his face. So far things are looking good.

    They got home and put him in the backyard. My brother and his wife walked thru the house and out the back sliding door to see where the dog had gone to. In a flash the dog whipped between the two of them and right into the house. My brother ran in after him. Just in time to find the dog in the corner with the family cat sticking out of both sides of its mouth. He ran over straddled the dog who by now, was thrashing the poor cat from one wall to wall. He reached with both hands and pried the cat out of the dog’s mouth. The cat was completely unharmed but more than likely will need counseling after this ordeal.  

    The dog is still in search mode looking for that cat, but my brother isn’t letting go.  By this time he has a severe gash on his right leg from the claws of this un-kept dog and an even worse bite that nearly took of the tip of one of his fingers off. 

    Mad as can be, and partially bandage up by his quick thinking wife, he grabbed the dog and threw him back into the car. Of course by now the poor dog was whimpering and for the most part realized he had done something wrong. But my brother has already had enough. So back to the cemetery he went with the dog. When he got there he opened the car door and said "GET"... the dog jumped out, slammed the door and drove off....

That is until the police officer turned on his sirens and pulled him over... "Ah, sir, is that your dog?" 
"No" 
"Well, there is an ordinance for abandoning animals in the city limits.... that will be a five hundred dollar fine." 
"WHAT! The dog bit me, damned near killed our cat... my wife spotted the dog here just hours ago... Look, I've got to go to the emergency room for stitches." 
"The dog bit you sir, and it's not your dog... well, we have to call the vet and animal recovery... you'll need checked for rabies"

     So off to the vets office, a police officer and animal recovery with a dog, all parading behind one shell shocked guy partially bandaged and bleeding on his steering wheel.  At the vets office he was informed that he will either need weeks of shots and the dog will have to be put down... which will cost quite a bit. Or, you can have the dog put down, the dogs head sent off to have the brain stem checked for rabies and that will only take two or three days, which means you can avoid the shots all together.  And, your cat may have to be put down if the dog is found to have rabies too. 

    That'll be another $500.00 to add my brother’s ever growing bill.... After finally getting to the emergency room, with the stitches, x-rays, medication, vet bill, state exam for rabies, the ticket no less for abandoning an animal... and don’t forget the now traumatized cat’s psychiatric  consultations … which he is sure his wife will insist on.

   The ever thoughtful-animal savior he married cost him nearly 3000.00 dollars in one afternoon for picking up some stray dog that licked him in the face… and he’s got the scars to prove it.

I think that'll be the last time that this ever happens at his house again.  

Thanks Mike, great story, and I’ll make sure I tell everyone about it. 

 I’m just soooo glad it wasn’t me… this time……………

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